Welcome to the Saturday Morning Funnies - Robin Hayes Edition. Over the past couple of weeks Robin Hayes has been overshadowed by his opponent's generosity (selling gas to 500 people for $1.22 a gallon is pretty durned generous), the release of a wonderful song inspired by said opponent (asking us, "Have you had enough?") and the death of 60 adorable puppies - deaths that could have been prevented if Robin Hayes had worked just a little bit harder to move the PAWS legislation through the committee he chairs.
If Hayes, as I've alleged in the past, is so impotent that he can't move legislation through a committee he chairs and he's so arrogant he allows a first-time EVER candidate to upstage his slick professional campaign with a simple act of generosity, then what good do his years of experience do us in Washington? What exactly has he been doing with his time?
For starters, Hayes kicked off the past campaign cycle by attending the President's inauguration with his good Abramoff buddy, J.D. Hayworth ($101,000 from Abramoff and his clients). Check out that fancy scarf, big guy. What is that? Cashmere from Tibet? Silk from China? Or, it might be fabric even more rare than either of those. It might be a rare find - 8th District textiles. Rare, because Hayes has spent his time sending 8th District textile jobs to Central America.
Follow below the flip...
But WAIT! Robin Hayes promised he wouldn't do that, right? He promised the people of the 8th District that he would vote against CAFTA.
"It's not in the best interests of the core constituency I represent," and "Every time I drive through Kannapolis and I see those empty plants, I know there is no way I could vote for CAFTA."
Don't feel badly if you were one of the people who believed Hayes when he made those promises. Apparently he suckered a lot of folks in the district. It wasn't the first broken promise from Hayes or the first lie and it probably won't be the last.
Attending the inaugural, fibbing, breaking promises, sitting on important legislation and sending jobs to Central America aren't the only activities Hayes has participated in while he's been in Washington. Oh no, Hayes has also been accepting donations. Lots of them.
Some of his biggest donors are the big oil companies. Yes, the very companies charging us an arm and a leg for a gallon of gas are sharing their profits with Robin Hayes and his cronies in Washington by giving them huge campaign contributions. Robin Hayes might deny that he's in the pocket of big oil, but there's no denying that it's their money jingling in his pockets and fattening his campaign coffers.
Big business PACs aren't the only source of campaign money for Hayes. His fellow rubberstamp Republicans in Washington give Hayes plenty of money. Among the group is one felon, one man under indictment, one man fined $210,000 for illegal campaign contributions, two admonished by the House Ethics Committee, four connected to defense lobbyist investigations, eight who are proven liars and five admitted adulterers. I can only imagine if Robin Hayes was more open about his associations with these people and the fact that he takes money from them, there would be quite a few voters in North Carolina's 8th Congressional District that wouldn't be lining up to join this crowd. One of his favorite is Tom DeLay who made sure to line those campaign coffers with a hefty total of a little more than $52,000 over the years. At that level of giving one has to wonder just what it will take to get rid of the DeLay itch.
Collecting big fat checks isn't the only activity Robin Hayes participates in. He likes to pretend he's part of the working class. He's been known to hoist himself up into a piece of heavy equipment to demolish homes in his district. I mean seriously, if he's going to send their jobs to Central America they won't be able to afford their homes any longer, now will they? You might be wondering if that is a dress shirt Hayes is wearing up on that dozer. It most certainly is. Robin Hayes just wants to pretend to be working class, he certainly doesn't want to be mistaken for someone who works for a living.
More recently Robin Hayes spent some time making a big fat ass out of himself. During a routine "I'm the Man" flyover and press conference at the airport in Charlotte, Hayes proclaimed the security at the airport in fine shape. The problem is, he didn't bother to inform himself of the two security breaches which both occurred in the past two weeks. Oooops. For video of Hayes getting caught being ignorant of the facts you can go here and scroll down.
So, when you can't find Robin Hayes sitting on legislation that could have saved puppies from a fiery death, accepting big fat checks from big oil and other business friends, hanging out with adulterers and indictees, slapping locks on mills in his district and sending the jobs to Central America, introducing legislation as a political ploy during election season or misstating the security at our nation's airports; just where can you find Robin Hayes?
Hmmmm, well, if he isn't out killing duckies.....
You shouldn't have to look too hard. He's probably just sitting around somewhere counting all his money.