I just finished law school.

I just finished my last law school assignment. Ever. A week from right now I'll be getting all graduated and then my family members can start asking me about traffic tickets and whether I can help them with their wills.

Congrats to me, of course, and to TarGator, who will also be walking next weekend. As for now, I believe I'll be drinking a cold Fat Tire and then maybe getting some sleep, and then maybe watching some Simpsons.... Really, the possibilities are endless.


Congratulations Lance and Targator!

I am very proud of you both. I know some great hangover remedies if you need them.

Vote Democratic! The ass you save may be your own.

Remember, bars aren't for passing...

they're for drinking in.

Vote Democratic! The ass you save may be your own.

Wow. I didn't even go to my graduation

for my BA -- I was that anxious to get away from hallowed halls. I can't imagine going back for more long years of propaganda, I mean, boredom, I mean, wonderful educational experiences.

Ditto on the congrats!!!!

Funny story

I wasn't going to go to my graduation either. My mother's family has a reunion-style get-together every spring. Late this winter somebody got the bright idea to have it here for my graduation. I went from "not going at all" to "going and hosting a bazillion family members." Funny.

Does your wife think this is funny?

I was sent over the edge by an overnight guest who arrived with very little warning. The wingnut who visited on Thursday. I'm still teetering on the edge. :)

Vote Democratic! The ass you save may be your own.

She's glad that I'm going to graduation

And we had plenty of warning - at least a couple of months.

You have a wonderful wife

and I'm sure you have a great family. I, on the other hand would like to adopt mine out. :)

Vote Democratic! The ass you save may be your own.

She's the best

And while I do like a lot of my family, we should maybe pitch in to get a deserted island big enough...

I will earmark my first million...


Vote Democratic! The ass you save may be your own.

Congrats Lance & Targator make sure you PAY

And who is Max the Dog?

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Clemson parking ticket scandal

Subject: Gene's Column, Gene Owens is a national known retired writer who op-eds with major mainstream media in the South about Southern Culture and politics.

Clemson's great parking-ticket scandal

By Gene Owens

Connie Mack Berry Jr. rolled up some impressive statistics in football and basketball at Clemson University between 1957 and 1960, but the statistic that dwarfs them all is the one that denied him a degree from Clemson: a bill for $43,078.78 in campus parking tickets.

Berry, now living in Carey, N. C., says the parking-ticket scandal is only one source of his notoriety on the Clemson campus. Another involves his exit from a classroom via a third-floor window. He did it to test his Yankee psychiatry professor's theory that pain was all in the head, and you could jump out the window and land without experiencing pain if you just put it out of your mind.

Berry went out the window, and moments later his classmates saw him lying on the ground. He slowly got up and hollered, It worked!

It worked because he had secretly tied a rope inside the window and rappelled to the ground. But he got A's for the rest of the course.

Connie Mack Berry Jr. assures me that all this is true, and I have to believe him. He bears a name that stands for all that's good and wholesome about athletics, a name borne by two hall-of-famers who never heard of steroids.

One is Cornelius McGillicuddy, the original Connie Mack, owner and one-time playing manager for the Philadelphia Athletics. Mack met Connie's grandfather, William Clinton Berry, during the 1920s, while the A's were barnstorming through the South. Berry was a one-armed third baseman who also managed a semi-pro mill team in South Carolina. He had stuck one arm into a cotton gin and pulled out a stump. He fielded by catching the ball in his glove, tossing glove and ball into the air, then snatching the ball with his bare hand. His admired Connie Mack, and named his son after him.

Connie Mack Berry became an athletic standout at North Carolina State and later played on championship teams in three professional sports: with baseball's Chicago Cubs, the National Football League's Chicago Bears, and the National Basketball Association's Oshkosh All Stars. He has been inducted into the North Carolina Sports Hall of Fame.

Connie Mack Berry Jr., played end on offense and defense for the upstart Clemson Tiger football team that lost 7-6 to the national champions, Louisiana State University, in the 1959 Sugar Bowl.

He was a team player on and off the field, which partly accounts for his huge parking-ticket debt.

As he tells it, his mother bought him a 1954 Chevrolet to drive off to college in 1957. Clemson was then an all-male institution, and the closest source of coeds was a nursing school in Anderson, some 15 miles away. A car was essential, and Clemson's athletes treated Connie's like community property.

Everybody that played sports used it 24/7, Berry said. Sometimes Connie wouldn't see it for weeks at a time.

The borrowers usually would come to him for keys. But if they couldn't find him, they would jimmy their way in and hot wire the ignition. They parked wherever they wished on campus, often in spaces reserved for faculty and staff.

It would always be parked in somebody's spot Connie said. All they could do was keep ticketing it. And, of course, nobody paid the tickets.

When Connie Mack was ready to receive his degree, Dean of Students Walter T. Cox called him into a conference with R. C. Edwards, then the president of Clemson. They told him he would have to pay the four years worth of parking fines before he could graduate. Connie told them he didn't have $43,078.78 on him and didn't know when he could get it..

I reminded them that Coach Howard owed me a great deal of funds for under-the-table services during my time at Clemson, and that we could simply make it an in-kind trade and forget the whole problem said Berry.

This invocation of the name of Frank Howard “ the Bear Bryant of Clemson football “ cut no ice with the academicians. No pay, no degree, they insisted.

On graduation day, Connie was handed a rolled-up piece of paper that said a Degree will be given upon full payment in cashier's check

Connie eventually landed in Marietta, Ga., where he learned that if you burned photographic negatives, the film would go up in smoke but the silver in the emulsion would remain, and you could sell it. That led him into the precious metals business, which became his main source of income.

He hasn't quit trying for that Clemson degree, though.

My cousin who is the lawyer for all of Clemson sports problems said the other day
that they would settle the affair for 50 cents on the dollar Connie told me. That, he speculated, would come to a net total of $1.95 million, allowing for compounded interest and inflation. Connie said he asked whether the university would accept a personal check on a bank in Panama. He hasn't heard back.

Connie Mack Berry Jr. is a political adviser and husband to Rachel Lee Hunter, who ran a strong race for associate justice on the North Carolina state Supreme Court. He says she's contemplating a race for chief justice in 2006 so she can be the boss of the candidate who defeated her.

Unfortunately, her jurisdiction won't extend to Clemson University, which lies safely south of the North Carolina state line. But who wants a degree when it's so much fun to owe $1.9 million?

(Readers may write Gene Owens at 1004 Cobbs Glen Drive, Anderson, S. C. or, E-mail him at genepegg@bellsouth.net)

Woot to Lance

Congrats dude.....My wife graduates from the NC State math education dept next weekend also.....Yipppieee.

Congratulations to your wife!

Where does she want to teach? I taught Algebra and Geometry in Apex for a few years, but a whole bunch of the people I taught with have moved on since.

Bajadudes...what grade will she teach?


Vote Democratic! The ass you save may be your own.

my wife is nuts

She wants to teach HS.....She did her student teaching at Broughton HS. As to where she will teach, we are not sure since we are trying to fit in as many stressful things as possible in as short a time as possible...Lets see 17 weeks pregnant with our first kid, we just had our offer on a new home in Raleigh accepted and have a closing on May 26th, graduation, 2006 elections, kid due in Oct, major jobs to finish in NY, gotta find a new car for her since the 93 Acura she drives is a little inappropriate for her and a family car now. Sheesh...one step at a time, take deep breaths...we can do this.

Oh and two new websites spoofing Vermin Robinson and Russell Capps in the works.

You're one of those "doesn't sleep" types

I see. Wow. That's a lot of exciting stuff all at once. The Triangle is a great place to do most of those things. By which I mean teaching, being a parent, owning a home.

I'm sure she'll be great at

all of her new jobs, new homeowner/mover/packer, mom and teacher.
Congratulations on all the "news", especially the baby. Children are wonderful.

If you haven't looked at a Highlander, I can offer a great recommendation. I love mine and it is high enough profile to provide some safety without actually being an SUV. It's built on a Camry chassis so drives like a car. I hear they are working the kinks out of the hybrids too, though my husband says they don't actually pay for themselves. I tried to tell him "it's the environment that is saved", but he didn't get it. I bought mine their first year out and they were one of the few cars that had shoulder harnesses in all three seats in back.

Vote Democratic! The ass you save may be your own.

She's NOT nuts. I've tutored Algebra

to middle and high schoolers. I love those ages. But I think you better watch out on the stress. You're way over the top on that, even if it's happy stuff. So, my advice is eat lots of ice cream. Or . . . maybe you should get a clone to help you out.

Like the clone idea....

I'm packing the worst room in the house...the office/homeschool room/sewing room, so I have old movies playing. I'm watching The Firm in honor of Tar and Lance.

Vote Democratic! The ass you save may be your own.

is that the kind of work he'll be doing?

Young new hot-shot junior lawyer for some big mysterious corrupt all-powerful impersonal law firm? He could be a mole, spying for the good guys and destroy the corrupt firm from within.

I think I've found a new career. Writing the trials and tribulations of my imaginary Lance . . .Oh, I forgot to call the firm rabid. Or will Lance be rabid? Oh, you'll have to buy the book to find out.

It's hard to picture Lance foaming at the mouth.

The dog came up to spend time with me...she started sneezing sitting near all the books. I hadn't pulled them all out to dust the tops in a while. Poooooor puppy had a sneeze fit and went back downstairs. I'm really not a bad housekeeper. I just kinda ignored all the books, etc.

Vote Democratic! The ass you save may be your own.

It's not a deserted island but

Thanks for the advice Drama Queen

For stress relief we bought 2.5 acres on the beach in Baja Mexico about 9 years ago and built a very simple rustic beach house....We don't get down there near enough. I keep thinking we'll have a liberal retreat with hard working fellow activists one of these years....miles of deserted beaches and lots of camping space, outdoor kitchen, solar electric, flush toilet and great outdoor shower. Notice the hippie bus under the house!

That looks like fun...

We have 3 acres in Lincoln County. I mean...we could name it Republican Acres. I will be the only Democrat within miles. I'm thinking a liberal retreat in our woods would be kinda fun...scare the locals. :)

Vote Democratic! The ass you save may be your own.

I'll vote for a Baha

BlueNC retreat. Let's go right now. It's 43 out. Our friends from Arizona can't stop exclaiming over the fog. I thought it was Spring.

If you are into rustic you

If you are into rustic you all are welcome to use it...nothing is locked and only screen doors. I'll just let jesus our caretaker know you are heading down. he's there about 3 days a week...or should be at least :)

Lance ya need a break/graduation present? I see about $500 R/T on travelocity (airport code is SJD)

WAY TA GO LANCEBOY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I is proud of ya Boy! Great Job! Great Job! And good deal on Targator also!!! Stand proud me boy,You earned it!
I even got a Tort case I will send ya if you want to handle it fer free! Should I get the sign painter started? Lets see?

Sir, Lance, Esq. -Atty. at Law
No case too big,None too small!

Congrats Buddy!

Just remember us

when you're rich and famous, which I know you will be. Many happy wishes to both you and Targator. You guys are the best.